All your base are belong to us

A Thousand Splendid Suns

with 13 comments

The very best of mankind’s creations have one thing in common – they have all been inspired by nature. Even nine year olds know how the avians inspired us to build the airplane, someone wiser about how owls led to the bullet train and an elite few as to how Jar Jar Binks was probably inspired by Lucas himself. Biomimetics is just a fancy term for one of the few things we are actually good at, reinventing the wheel. In this light, the thought of modeling network traffic along the lines of swarm behaviour no longer seems a ludicrous thought. But of course as is always the case, revolutionary ideas take a backseat in lieu of other pressing issues, namely a few lines of code and a report. Research, I’ve realized is pretty much the same everywhere. Just when you start making progress, someone else publishes a paper superseding yours and you get to take out all your frustration on the gullible B.Techs. Can’t wait for my postgrad really!

An uncanny love for faltoo facts and arbitrary capitalization (refer to the title) made sure I was never popular company on the net or off it. I’ve been endlessly chastised and termed useless but did you know that the word gymnasium is derived from the combining form gymno-, meaning nude or bare (in ancient Greece, they did train with nothing on). Any networks guy is bound to be fascinated by torrents, in my humble opinion one of the greatest innovations of this decade. There’s everything and voila, there’s nothing! But having discovered their true potential only this summer, I am in the words of a wise person ‘A child, just learning to walk for the first time’. Torrents are also a voyeur’s dream. A world where you can IP-search and kick out your peers just for the heck of it. Last I checked, a random Korean was leeching a Rajinikanth movie off me. And then there’s a certain linux distro ironically named humanity. Ubuntu keeps chucking more problems at me than life itself and yet there is something so alluring about the terminal. She’s not the hot girl you fantasize about, nor the one who keeps hitting on you. She’s the quintessential girl next door; the more you talk to her, the more you realize she’s awesome. And you’re probably going to end up marrying her. sudo get me a life.

My daily schedule leaves nothing to imagination. Hot chocolate in the morning followed by a session with the president on issues of national importance, some tips to Xavi and co on how to improve their passing and research during the rest of my time. Publishing papers by the morning and hot girls swooning over me in the nights, nuff said… All that in a different universe though. In this world, I just have coffee, savour the kannadiga’s greatest contribution to mankind, some more coffee, hone my LaTeXing skills and go back to sleep. A life-changing decision this summer notwithstanding, no points for guessing that it is this universe I prefer. I guess everyone has to go through the stage where they wonder whether they would have been better off with the blue pill. Though I guess it would hurt less if all you can see is code and have a kick-ass (literally) girlfriend to boot and oh, you get to smooch Monica Bellucci as well. I digress. A thousand splendid ideas and here I am just where I started. Perhaps I need a break. Maybe I need one of those pensieves. Maybe I need a hard kick. Maybe, May be, I just need more coffee. All is well with the world.


Written by Chronoz

July 10, 2010 at 2:48 pm

Posted in Yet Another Rant

Tagged with , ,

13 Responses

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  1. Random fact of the day: Raghavendra Upahara in Jayanagar 9th Block makes the second best coffee in the world.


    July 10, 2010 at 3:00 pm

  2. I agree with Dhila, though I’d say third best. Also, I am currently in a sweet location, owing to the fact that Terence Tao uses the same LaTeX editor as I do. Needless to say, I suck at it.

    We had some brilliant seminars on swarm behaviour. I can send you the papers if you want. Am I counting too much on your geekiness? Also, use Fedora.


    July 10, 2010 at 4:06 pm

    • Do mail me. Have been doing some light reading on Swarm behaviour and its applications in computer science.


      July 10, 2010 at 5:42 pm

  3. Taking the blue pill? Matrix has had it’s effect … I thought you’d be one to quote Robert Frost, not laurence Fishburne 😀


    July 10, 2010 at 5:19 pm

  4. @Dela: Upahara!? And this coming from the guy who considers his own coffee to be number 1.

    @Raps: Do send. And I’ll have the Fedora vs Ubuntu discussion with you sometime.

    @Rapster: Dei! I’m not that senti da…


    July 10, 2010 at 5:41 pm

  5. You mention arbitrary capitalisation and forget one Akansh Dubey? Tch tch.

    In another world, LaTeXing could’ve been a product of that same whim, don’t you think?


    July 10, 2010 at 9:18 pm

  6. I started using torrents too, finally. Downloaded Toy Story 1 and 2. The theater beckons soon as I finish watching them.

    So your entire summer in a nutshell was this one wonderful word- faltoo. I know you are having sudden doubts about what it actually means. Check it out.
    At least you get to drink great coffee.


    July 11, 2010 at 10:04 am

  7. Brilliant. And here I was writing an essay for a scholarship on the importance of a liberal education in engineering.


    July 11, 2010 at 7:16 pm

  8. Hot Chocolate? Wow. Killer, Shreyas!


    July 12, 2010 at 5:03 am

  9. The last few days, I’ve been cooking and drinking payathamparuppu kanji before coming to work (for sister, and hence for me) and its awesome.

    and start using TeXnic, its awesome! I’ll tell you a bunch of new stuff i’ve learnt to use on TeX, its too awesome. Which includes, writing Tamizh in LaTeX. \m/


    July 12, 2010 at 7:06 am

  10. @Muruth: Maybe Mr.Knuth has an Indian connection, after all. And wiki Dubey btw

    @Shru: Engineering is a sham. Open thy eyes 😀

    @Anunaya: LOL, coffee anyday da 🙂


    July 17, 2010 at 7:24 pm

  11. @Semi: TeX maker is good da. Not sure if Ubuntu has TeXmaker.

    @Arun: Make the most of your net. Download as much as you can. My 1TB heaven beckons.


    July 17, 2010 at 7:25 pm

  12. electric cars Hydrogen cars would greatly improve the quality and affordability. Roadster and isn’t shy about heaping praise on the accelerator. Braking System Usually, the electric vehicle like Toyota Prius, uses battery power up to the accelerator pedal to help in directing electricity flow from the movie will delight any child.


    October 23, 2012 at 8:35 pm

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